And when I go there, I go there with you...

...it's all I can do.

-Where the Streets Have No Name, U2

Today is the Barron's birthday. He doesn't read this blog, although he does know about it's existence. So, with that in mind, Happy Birthday, hon! It's been a long and rough year, but I could never have gotten through it with out your love and unwavering support. Marrying you was the best decision I ever made, and I can't wait to see you be a father to our baby. I love you.

Introducing....

Here's my little bean! It doesn't look much like a bean anymore, so I'm going to have to come up with some new names for it. My husband and I love its little arms, and walk around the house with our hands glued to our sides to imitate what they look like (kind of like dinosaur arms!)



Heh. So cute.

Tag! Looks like I'm it

Sara the GasPasser has tagged me! Oy, the pressure to be interesting. Forgive me if I bore your brains out, but it's gotta be done.

But first, an update:

This week has been insane. Work is crazy busy and we're dealing with some sort of legislation in New York State that may affect my business-dealings negatively. I'm hoping it all boils over and that the law doesn't officially go through, but I need to prepare. Gah. Oh well, I guess it's good to obsess over something that isn't baby-related.

As for the baby, things are going smoothly. I'm still seeing some trace spotting, mostly when using the bathroom, but the OB says that everything looks perfect with the baby and that I shouldn't be concerned. I'm going to try and scan my ultrasound at some point to share the pic with ya'll. It's really starting to look like a baby now, and hearing the heartbeat was seriously just the most amazing thing. I didn't expect to be affected the way I was, but it was wonderful.

Ok, so on to the tagging - here are the rules:

1. Link to the person who tagged you. - Done!
   
2. Post the rules. - Done!
   
3. Share six non-important habits/quirks about yourself.
4. Tag three other people.
5. Make sure the people you tagged know you did by commenting on what you did.

1. My sister is 20 years older than me, and we are the only two children in the family. Same parents, no miscarriages in between, etc...(wonder where I get my fertility issues from?). My mother was 20 when she had her, 40 when she had me. Most of my life, my sister and I have had more of a mother/daughter relationship, but have recently started becoming much closer as sisters - she is thrilled about this pregnancy and is planning on spoiling the baby rotten!

2. As a result of #1, I have been an Aunt since the age of four. I have two nephews; one is four years younger than me and the other is eight years younger. They are more my brothers than my nephews and I could never imagine my life without them.

3. I have seen the Pope (John Paul II) twice. In 1994 while I was in High School, I attended World Youth Day in Denver, CO with my Youth Ministry group; and in 1997 I perfomed at the Vatican as part of my college choir at the Canonization (making a saint) of the founder of my college.

4. My husband and I LOVE going to concerts. I have always been a music fan, but he far encompasses me. Just for example, in the next month, we are seeing REM, Tom Petty, Pearl Jam (twice), and Dave Matthews Band. Other favorites include U2, Foo Fighters, and the Tragically Hip (and wishful thinking, the Beatles). We are determined to have this child listen to good music, but I'm sure we'll loose out to the kiddie music at some point.

5. I did a college internship at Late Night with Conan O'Brien. During that time, his assistant was pregnant, so I filled in for her on a number of occasions. He's an awesome guy and I have nothing but good things to say about that experience.

6. My favorite place in the world is the Cafe du Monde in New Orleans, LA. My husband and I spent our honeymoon in NOLA, and spent many an hour sitting there, drinking cafe au lait, eating beignets, and watching the world go by. During Katrina, I was devastated to think of the damage done to this beloved city, and I am counting the days until we go back. I have been to Ireland and Italy, which are both amazing, but this always holds a special place in my heart.

Ok, so that's my dealio. In return, I am tagging Tara, JJ, and Candi - sorry if you've done these already ladies, I'm new at this!

For all my American compatriots - have a great extended weekend! Woo hoo!

Phew

Everything is fine. Saw the bean, heard the heartbeat. Thank God. Ok, off to get some stuff done today. More from me later

Still spotting

Very trace amounts and the RE's office says it's normal, (esp. after coming off progesterone) but it was a teeny tiny bit red when I wiped today, and I'm so nervous. OB appointment tomorrow. Please let everything be ok.

It never gets easier, does it?

PIO shots ended on Friday night. Yay!

Noticed brown spotting today - not so much yay.

Why does this always happen on the weekend?

Why can't I look like this? (And I'm only having one baby!)

Flawless. Damn.

But seriously, 6 kids under the age of 7? Wow. I am in awe. Even with nannies and the like. Wow.

Anywho, I know it's been a while since I've posted, but I haven't really had all that much to report. Things have been pretty much plugging along. The nausea has mostly subsided and I'm starting to feel more like myself. I've actually gotten in a few brisk walks outside and started doing light weight training to tighten up my arms and the like. I'm trying to stay somewhat fit (not that I'm the picture of fitness), for a wedding that I'm in on November 1st. Yeah, I'll be 7.5 months pregnant...what of it?

My most anticipated event comes at 8:30EST Friday evening, when the Barron administers my final PIO shot! I (and my ass) have been waiting for this day for over 2 months. I have demanded that we go out on Saturday night to celebrate - for once I won't have to run home to get stuck! Yahoo!

Also visiting the OB on Wednesday. This will be my first OB visit and the first time I've seen the bean in about 3 weeks. Hopefully everything is progressing nicely.

...that dress is effing amazing. Gah!

Things are looking up

So, I've managed to string together three relatively nausea-free days and feel much more like myself. This of course has now led me to being nervous that I'm NOT feeling sick. "Is there something wrong?" etc.... Never a dull moment, I tell you.

Anywho, one of my closest friends had her baby on Monday. This friend is the person I was writing about when I started this blog. I can't believe how far we've come since then. She had a beautiful baby girl and is feeling all sorts of excitement. I know she's been through a lot to get here and I couldn't be happier for her.

Now, I just want to skip the next 7 months or so and have this kid. I can't wait. Oh, and another thing I can't wait for? May 16th - last PIO shot. I'm counting the days...so is my ass.

The hangover that never ends

Nausea. Won't go away. Won't give me an hour's peace. All I want to do is go outside for a walk, but I'm afraid of throwing up on a neighbors lawn. Please baby, give your mother a break.

The exception to the rule?

I just got off the phone with my mom. She's been telling people here and there about the pregnancy, (which is fine; I'm pretty much over trying to keep her quiet now) and everyone is reacting kindly. "She's so thrilled!", "She cried!", etc.

Then she asked me: "have you told anyone else yet?"
"Not really," I said. "I'll tell people when I see them".

Then I realized. I'm not really going out of my way to tell people. I could tell that she thought this was strange, but it's just how I feel. I am definitely excited, but I haven't gotten to the point of yelling and screaming and jumping around the house. Maybe it's the fear of something still going wrong, I don't know.

Also, and I know this sounds odd....I don't want to be defined by this pregnancy. Ever since I've told certain people about it, it's all they ask about:

"How are you feeling?"
"Are you excited?"
"Have you registered yet?"
etc...

I'm still me. Yes, I'm pregnant. Yes, I'm going to have a baby (God willing). But, I still work every day, still do my laundry, still watch TV and laugh with my husband. I'm still me, just with a little extra. Can we talk about something else, please?

Maybe it's the IF thing. I'm so used to being the infertile that this is just foreign to me. I'm still not sure how I should be reacting.

I kiss the sonogram picture on the fridge every day and read exerpts from the "pregnancy journal" to my husband on a nightly basis. I rub my belly and tell my baby how much we love it and can't wait to meet it every night. I look online at nursery furniture and bedding and strollers, but won't dare purchase a thing until at least the 2nd trimester...I do all of these things...I just don't feel like shouting it from the rooftops just yet. Am I the exception to the rule?